cruise meme funny

47 Funny Cruise Ship Memes – Best for 2024

If you’re looking for a good laugh, then look no further than these funny cruise ship memes. From the silly to the downright absurd, these memes will have you chuckling in no time.

We’ve scoured the internet for some of the funniest cruise memes out there, and we’re sure you’ll get a good laugh out of them or at least raise a smile.

I’ve tried to capture every funny side of cruising, including memes about needing a cruise through to cruise day, the onboard buffet food, and many more.

But first in case you didn’t already know.

So what’s a cruise ship meme?

A cruise ship meme is any funny or relatable image or video that’s been shared online, typically with a caption added. And when it comes to cruise ship memes, there’s no shortage of funny cruise ship pics.

Whether you’re a seasoned cruiser or someone who’s thinking about taking their first cruise, these memes will definitely resonate.

So sit back, relax, and enjoy some of the funniest cruise ship memes out there.

Funny Cruise Memes

In case you are looking for a specific type of cruise meme relating to a specific cruise line or situation such as being a cruise addict or overindulging in the buffet we have split the memes into humor categories below.

Near the end, we group a random selection of the best and funniest cruise memes for you to enjoy before ending with memes that represent the feelings of disembarkation day.

Carnival Cruise Memes

Carnival Cruises are the best and some passengers are very loyal.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Cruise Industry Expert (@seadaytravel)

Disney Cruise Memes

Disney-inspired cruise memes are always popular.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Cruise Memes (@cruise.memes)

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Kingdom Konsultant Travel (@kingdomkonsultants)

Booze Cruise Memes

For some cruisers, it’s all about the boozing and the drinks package, cocktails, and having a very merry time on vacation.

I like this feeling:

Cruise Food and Buffet Memes

We all know how good and how much food is on offer onboard the cruise ship.

No matter what your intentions are before embarking, it usually doesn’t last long.

Its actually quite surprising how much weight can be put on in 7 days!

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Steve Jones (@stevejonesvacations)

Know this feeling, especially on the first visit to the buffet. The joy and excitement is real.

Let’s get fat together.

Withdrawal symptoms from the buffet start to set in.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by richard (@cruisewithrichard)

View this post on Instagram A post shared by GangwayEveryday (@gangwayeveryday)

Haha, when you get home.

It was only 7 days, made the most of it though.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Prof Cruise (@profcruise)

I Need a Cruise Memes

We spend a lot of time waiting for the next cruise.

Do you get this excited when booking a cruise is mentioned?

My kind of house in between cruises (I wish).

This is a great idea for the yard.

Funny and cute!

What kind of friend are they anyway if they go without you?

The days are long while waiting.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Cruise Pics and Tips (@cruisepicsandtips)

When the wait is too long and you’ve reached breaking point!

It’s all about prioritizing for the cruise budget.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by 𝗖𝗿𝘂𝗶𝘀𝗲𝗕𝗲 (@cruisebe)

Packing Cruise Memes

It’s all about the packing

How do you distinguish your luggage?

Anyone else do this? (I do!)

It’s Cruise Day Memes

You know that crazy happy feeling!

Love this one, watch the kid’s food fly! (Poor kid but at least smiling)

Going on a Cruise Memes

When the cruise is booked nothing can stop the smile when that happy feeling has set in.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Hajózásról Őszintén (@thecruisepics)

The cruise is booked, all is good.

Every time, never gets old.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Cruisin’ & Schmoozin’ w/Tony (@tonycarnival)

Screw everything and everyone.

So exciting.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Rick Stover (@rickstover1)

Size 7 day Cruise Memes

When it comes to happy birthdays, Christmas, Mother’s and Father’s day, some people only want to wear a size 7 day cruise!

What do you want to wear for Christmas?

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Bolsover Cruise Club (@bolsovercruise)

Another one but this time for Disney:

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Let’s Talk Dis (@letstalkdispodcast)

Cruise Addict Memes

Are you a cruise addict?

This is the dream:

View this post on Instagram A post shared by The Lido Lizard (@lido_lizard)

Best Random Funny Cruise Memes

Can you see it? 🙂

Is this you? Where am I exactly?

Cruise towels.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Helloworld Travel Naracoorte (@helloworldnaracoorte)

Yes, it’s a cruise cabin!

Is this you whenever you hear the word cruise.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Dave & Brandy’s Excursions (@daveandbrandys_excursions)

Love cruising meme.

Disembarkation Day Cruise Memes

All good things must come to end (until the next cruise).

No rush to leave the ship, or even the cabin.

View this post on Instagram A post shared by More Precious Than Gold (@morepreciousthangoldta)

Do you think we’d ever get away with it? Hide.

Know this feeling. Hard times.

Back home to chores.

More Funny Memes

If you are still looking for more funny cruising memes or image you might find some at these sources which our updated regularly:

Cruise Memes Facebook Groups – a great source and no wonder it has over 75,000 followers. They also post many of their memes on their Instagram page .

I hope these cruise memes made you laugh or gave you a few reasons to smile.

Which one was your favorite? Feel free to let me know.

Related Posts

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How Many Doors on a Cruise Ship? (Yes, I Counted)

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25 Funny-Relatable Cruise Memes and Cruise Jokes Revolving Cruise Travel

Embark on a laughter-filled voyage with our collection of cruise memes and jokes.

Whether you’re in for outright hilarity, honest truths, or a dose of delightful corniness, our selection captures the diverse humor of the cruise experience. From buffet fun to navigating cruise ship dilemmas, join us in celebrating the lighter side of cruise travel with these funny and relatable cruise memes and jokes.

Feel free to share our cruise memes and jokes with your friends. Don’t forget to tag us! Tell us your favorite cruise meme, cruise joke, or cruise pun in the comments.

Table of Contents

1. Formal Flip Flop Night

Me deciding which shoes to pack for a cruise: “But what if there’s a formal flip-flop night?”

2. Why did the banana go on a cruise?

Why did the banana go on a cruise? Because it wanted to slip into vacation mode.

3. Cruise Math is Hard

Choosing a drink package: Because adulting is hard, and so is math.

4. Trying all the Cruise Desserts

I’m going to eat healthy on this cruise. Also me… let me try all the desserts.

5. The Wardrobe Doesn’t Go as Planned

My cruise wardrobe plan vs. What I actually end up wearing.

Read more: Women’s Cruise Wear Guide

6. Why did the cruise ship break up with the ocean?

Why did the cruise ship break up with the ocean? It needed space.

7. Fairy Godmother On Formal Night

When your fairy godmother shows up for formal night.

8. Cruise o’Clock Meme

The only countdown that matters: Cruise o’clock!

9. Cruise Sea Days and Lounge Chairs

Finding a lounge chair on a cruise sea day: Mission Impossible!

10. What did the ocean say to the cruise ship?

What did the ocean say to the cruise ship? Nothing, it just waved.

11. More Time Eating Than Exploring

When you’ve spent more time eating than exploring the ports.

12. Cruise Elevators

The real test of patience on a cruise: elevators.

Cruise Tip: Always take the stairs.

13. 3 Rules of Cruising

Rule 1: Don’t ask someone their real age; we’re all forever 29 on the Lido Deck. Rule 2: No calorie counting. Calories don’t count at sea, right? Rule 3: If someone drops their ice cream cone, we all pretend it never happened. Sea mishaps are classified under ‘Ship Happens.’

14. Packing for a Cruise Like a Tetris Champion

Me when it’s time to pack for a cruise: Pretending I’m a Tetris champion with my suitcase. It must all fit!

Read more: Cruise Items to Pack for a Cruise

15. Take Advantage Of The Drink Package

Taking advantage of that drink package. “Another one, please!”

16. Watching the Cruise Countdown

When the cruise countdown is still in the triple digits… then hits the double digits and finally the single digits!

17. Money Can Buy Happiness

Money can buy happiness. It’s called a cruise.

18. Studying Cruise Deck Maps

Studying the cruise deck maps like it’s a treasure map. Buffet, I’m coming for you!

19. Cocktail to Order Next

On a Cruise: The only decision I want to make is which cocktail to order next.

20. Reading Turns Into Dancing By The Pool

Me on a cruise: I’m going to read a book by the pool Also, me, when the DJ plays my favorite song: Get’s up to dance, “Oh, that’s my song!”

21. What’s a cruise ship’s favorite kind of music?

What’s a cruise ship’s favorite kind of music? Rock and roll!

22. Waking Up Early For A Day At Port

Waking for a day at work: Hitting snooze like it’s my job. Waking up for a day at port.

23. Expert at the Cruise Spa

Cruise Spa Level: Expert. Because relaxation is a sport, and I’m going for the gold.

24. What to Get Me For My Birthday

In case you’re wondering what to get me for my birthday… I’m a size 7-night Caribbean Cruise.

25. Daydreaming About 5 to 9

Guess which one I’m daydreaming about? 9 to 5 (work) or 5 to 9 (on vacation)

BEFORE YOU SET SAIL, HERE ARE SOME RELATED ARTICLES YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS:

• Inspiring Cruise Quotes
• Foodie Travel Quotes

Meet Kathy Ava, a food, travel, and cruise writer based in Los Angeles/Pasadena, and the owner and main writer of Tasty Itinerary. With over 20 years of experience planning trips and logistics at her full-time job and for herself, she's become a pro at crafting unforgettable tasty itineraries. She's always on the hunt for delicious, fun travel destinations and cruise itineraries. She firmly believes that life is short and we must make the most of it, so always say yes to dessert.

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50 Best Cruise Jokes, Puns and Sayings that Will Make You Laugh

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The Ultimate Collection of Cruise Jokes, Puns and One Liners

If you love cruising and can use a laugh or two, read on! This collection of 50 of the best cruise jokes, puns and even some funny things overheard on cruise ships, will surely give you a chuckle.

The cruise puns and sayings can also make great captions on social media, and can even be printed on cruise t-shirts and mugs as you get ready for a future cruise !

If you love cruise jokes, memes and cruise travel inspiration , you’ll love our Life Well Cruised facebook page !

This post contains affiliate links which means if you click and buy that I may make a commission, at no cost to you. Please see my disclosure policy for details.

Life Well Cruised is a participant in the Amazon Services in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.

Short cruise jokes

Most of these cruise jokes are family friendly, so you can even teach your children any of them before your next cruise.

1. Ocean waves

What did one ocean say to the other?

Nothing. They just waved.

2. Colorful Cruise ship accident

Did you hear about the red cruise ship and the blue cruise ship that crashed into each other at sea?

All the survivors were marooned.

3. Marriage trouble

I bought my wife a ticket to go on a cruise. It’s no Titanic, but I’m optimistic.

4. Latest cruise ship trend

Did you hear the latest trend is installing trampolines on cruise ships? Now everyone is jumping on board.

5. Cruise Ship Talk

What do you call an azipod that doesn’t work? 

6. Nervous new cruiser

A nervous first time cruiser asked the Captain, “Do ships like this sink very often?” No, replied the Captain, “Usually only once.”

7. No Leeks allowed

What vegetable isn’t allowed on cruise ships?

8. Cruise crew joke

What’s it like working on a cruise ship?

It has it’s up and downs

9. Christmas cruise joke

Where does Santa go on vacation?

10. Marine life

Why do fish swim in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

11. Bermuda Triangle

What would you call the Bermuda triangle if it had 4 corners? The Bermuda Wreck-Tangle

12. The friendly sea

How do we know we know the ocean is friendly?

13. Haunted cruise

What do ghosts eat on a cruise?

14. Mermaids

What does a mermaid use to call her friends?

A shell phone of course!

15. Cruise ship sickness

Where do sick cruise ships go?

Longer cruise jokes

16. on a cruise ship deck.

A man is standing on deck, gazing out at the water. As the ship passes a small remote island, he spots somebody. He squints to make out what he sees – a thin, straggly man with wild looking hair. He watches as the man runs from side to side, jumps up and down and waves his arm. 

The cruise passenger turns to the captain and says “What’s up with that guy?” The captain shrugs and replies “I don’t know, but he’s happy to see us every year when we pass!”

17. Sinking cruise ship joke

A cruise ship sinks in the middle of the sea and the cruise passengers manage to escape on life boats. A woman asks the Captain “How far is the closest land?”

“3 miles”, he answers. “That’s not too bad, in which direction?, she asks.

The Captain replied “Down”

18. Inside cabin problems

A couple called down to guest services, complaining that they were stuck and couldn’t get out of their cabin. 

“What’s the issue?”, answered the purser. “There are only 2 doors”, replied the woman. “One is the bathroom and the other says Do Not Disturb.”

19. A Pirate in a Bar

A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head. The bartender asks, “Hey, what’s with the paper towel?” The pirate says, “Argh, I’ve got a bounty on my head.”

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.

20. Popular cruise comedian joke

The showers in the cruise cabins are so small, I just soap the walls and spin around a few times!

21. Advice from the ocean

Be shore of yourself, come our of your shell, take time to relax and coast, avoid pier pressure, sea life’s beauty, don’t get tide down, make waves!

More travel jokes

22. airplane travel.

What kind of chocolate do they sell at the airport?

The plane chocolate.

23. Flight trouble

Why did the librarian get kicked off the plane?

It was overbooked

24. Emotional baggage

I told my suitcase there will be no cruise vacation this year. Now I’m dealing with emotional baggage!

Recommended:  50 Best Gifts for Cruisers 2021 (that are unique & practical)

Funny things overheard on a cruise

Cruise ship crew have been sharing some of the funny things they’ve heard cruise passengers say over the years. We’ve also heard a few things that have given us a chuckle as well.

25. What time is the midnight buffet?

26. What happens to the ice sculptures after they melt?

27. To the Captain – “If you’re here, who’s driving the ship?” ( please don’t say this) 

28. Do these elevators go to the front of the ship?

29. Do the crew sleep on board?

30. Is the ocean salt water?

31. When visiting Rome “I’m surprised the ruins are in such bad shape.”

32. How do we know which pictures are ours?

33. How do they get enough water to fill the cruise ship pools while out at sea?

Suggested: 25 Surprising Things You Didn’t Know About Cruise Ships

Cruise puns and one liners

34. I’m struggling with jokes today, so you’ll have to put up with this one liner

Ok, in all seriousness, a good cruise pun often makes a fun, short and sweet Instagram caption, or can even be used on a personalized cruise t-shirt or mug design.

35. Cruiseitude (n)  a grumpy mood from lack of cruising

36. Thallosphile (n.) a person who loves the sea, oceans.

37. Sea you soon

38. What happens on the cruise ship, stays on a cruise ship.

39. I’m on vacation and I don’t give a ship

40. Ship happens

41. Feeling a little Nauti

42. Seas the day

43. Sea life’s beauty

44. Keep calm and cruise

45. Sorry, I was ship faced

46. Happiness comes in waves

47. Cruise hair, don’t care

48. I have no cruise control, It’s like they book themselves.

49. I need my vitamin sea

50. Whatever floats your boat

Read next:   25 Inspirational Cruise Quotes for Those Who Love Travel and Sea

Funny Cruise T-shirts, Coffee Mugs and Novelty Items

“Ship Faced” Thermal Coffee Mug

Cruise Mug “I’m just counting the days until my next cruise”

Seriously, this rings true for me every. single. day!

Cruise coffee mug “I don’t give a Ship”

Recommended: Funny cruise ship mug

Funny Cruise t-shirt – “Blame it on the drink package”

Final thoughts: 50 Best Cruise Jokes, Puns and Sayings that Will Make You Laugh and Smile

If you love cruising, I hope this post full of cruise jokes and sayings gave you a little pick me up. If you’re a bit sentimental, and are missing cruise life these days, check out this popular post full of the best cruise travel quotes .

Another post you might enjoy, if you’re a lover of the sea is:  25 Inspirational Ocean Quotes for Those That Love the Sea

Do you have a funny cruise joke, pun or story to share? Please let me know and share in the comments below.

Happy cruising!

P.S. If you’ve enjoyed this post, please don’t keep it to yourself ;-). Please share it with a friend on Facebook or save for later on Pinterest. Thanks so much!

Popular and related posts:

50 Best Gifts for Cruisers 2021 (that are unique & practical)

25 most recommended Amazon Items to Bring on a cruise

50 Inspirational Beach Quotes for Those that Love the Sea

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51 What are cruisers favorite cookies? Ships Ahoy. I know it is bad. I think it is as good as yours.

I love it!! I really did laugh out loud. I agree – just as bad, or good, as mine 😉

Cruise jokes can be corny, right? Thanks Russell!

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50 Hilarious Cruise Puns to Brighten Your Day

• March 22, 2024
• Cruise Chuckles

Set sail into a sea of laughter with our collection of 50 hilarious cruise puns that are shore to brighten your day! These puns are perfect for sharing with friends and family, or as quirky additions to your social media posts.

So, without further ado, let’s get sailing!

Sea you later, I’m on a cruise!

This is a playful way of saying goodbye, using “sea” instead of “see” because the person is going on a cruise.

I’m having a whale of a time on this cruise

“Whale” usually signifies something large. Here, it suggests having a huge amount of fun on a cruise, invoking images of the majestic sea creature and vast ocean fun.

Sail-abrating life on the high seas!

Combining “sailing” and “celebrating,” this phrase expresses joy and celebration while cruising the vast, open waters of the sea.

Cruising through life, one port at a time

A metaphor for taking life at a leisurely pace, similar to a cruise visiting ports.

Aboat time we took a cruise!

Playing on “about time” with “aboat,” this phrase humorously suggests it’s the right time to embark on a cruise.

Keep calm and cruise on

A calming phrase encouraging to continue cruising or moving forward, inspired by the “Keep calm and carry on” slogan.

I’m having a hull of a time on this cruise!

This phrase plays on “hell of a time,” using “hull” to reference the body of the ship.

Seas the day

A creative twist on the motivational phrase “Carpe Diem” or “Seize the Day,” suggesting making the most out of every moment aboard the cruise and embracing ocean life to the fullest.

Buoy, am I having fun!

Expressing enjoyment with a play on words using “buoy,” a floating marker at sea.

Life’s a cruise

This pun suggests that life should be as enjoyable and smooth as a cruise.

Sea-rious relaxation ahead

Combining “serious” with “sea,” this phrase forecasts a significant amount of relaxation coming up, ideal for a cruise vacation.

Let your worries drift away

This saying encourages leaving behind stress and concerns, much like how objects drift away in water, perfect for the cruise mindset.

Don’t harbor any regrets, just cruise

Playing on “harbor” as a safe place for ships, this pun advises against holding onto regrets and instead, to enjoy cruising.

On board for a boatload of fun

Using “on board” to mean participating, and “boatload” to indicate a large amount, this phrase promises a great deal of fun on the cruise.

I can knot wait to cruise!

A playful use of “knot,” a unit of speed at sea, instead of “cannot,” expressing eagerness for a cruise.

I have sail-ebrity status

This pun combines “sail” with “celebrity,” humorously implying a special or celebrity status while on a cruise.

Shore to be a good time

Using “shore” instead of “sure,” this pun guarantees a fun time, especially referencing activities on land during cruise stops.

Shorely you can’t resist a cruise

Surely, you can’t resist going on a cruise, with “shorely” as a pun on “surely.”

Ship happens, especially on a cruise

A humorous take on “stuff happens,” this phrase acknowledges the unexpected adventures and mishaps that can occur on a cruise.

Let’s make some waves with our plans tonight!

Suggesting creating excitement or stirring things up, using “waves” to symbolize making a significant impact.

I’m getting nauti on this cruise.

Using “nauti” as a play on “naughty,” this expression conveys having a fun, possibly mischievous time on a cruise.

It’s a-boat time we cruised!

A playful twist on “about time,” emphasizing that it’s the right moment to go on a cruise.

I aft to take another cruise

This pun uses “aft” (the back part of a ship) as a play on “have to” to express a strong desire to go on another cruise.

Dock-tacular views ahead!

Combining “dock” with “spectacular,” this pun highlights the expectation of amazing scenery to be seen from the ship or at port stops.

This cruise is smooth sailing!

“Smooth sailing” signifies that everything is going effortlessly and pleasantly, fitting for a hassle-free cruise experience.

Knot your average vacation

Playing with “knot,” a term used in nautical contexts, this pun suggests that a cruise is far superior to ordinary vacation options.

I’m on cruise control! 

Feeling relaxed and carefree, just like when your cruise ship is smoothly sailing on autopilot.

All aboard for some boat-iful memories!

This pun blends “beautiful” with “boat” to suggest creating lovely and memorable experiences while on a cruise.

Sail-abrate good times, come on!

A fun play on the classic song lyric, this phrase encourages passengers to celebrate the good times aboard the ship. 

Shore-ly, you can’t resist these ocean views!

A clever wordplay combining “shore” with “surely” to highlight the irresistible appeal of the ocean views during the cruise.

Port-y like a rockstar

A playful suggestion to enjoy port stops with the energy and enthusiasm of a rockstar, with a play on ‘port-y’ with ‘party’.

Water you doing if you’re not cruising?

Humorously questioning what else one could possibly be doing if not enjoying the pleasures of cruising, wordplay on “what are.”

I like big boats and I cannot lie

A humorous adaptation of the famous song lyric, expressing a genuine fondness for large cruise ships.

The best time to cruise is always tide now

Suggests that the best time to take a cruise is right now, playing on the words “tide now” and “right now.”

Cruisin’ through life, one day at a time

A metaphor for living life in a calm, unhurried manner, taking inspiration from the pace of a cruise.

All I need is a good dose of Vitamin Sea

A play on ‘Vitamin C’, highlighting the therapeutic and uplifting benefits of spending time at sea.

I’m feeling buoyant about this cruise!

A statement of feeling light-hearted and joyful about the cruise, playing on floating or buoyancy.

Ships and giggles

Suggesting a carefree, joyful experience on the cruise, filled with laughter and good times.

I’m having a reel good time on this cruise!

Expressing enjoyment of the cruise, playing on the words ‘real’ and ‘reel’.

This cruise is pier-fect!

Combining “pier” with “perfect,” this pun expresses complete satisfaction and contentment with the cruise experience.

This cruise is making me aquaholic!

A humorous spin on “alcoholic,” this pun suggests an overwhelming love for the sea and cruising, to the point of addiction. 

Our cruise is not just a vacation; it’s a fanta-sea come true!

Blending “fantasy” with “sea,” this pun portrays a cruise as a dreamlike adventure on the ocean.

What’s up, dock?

A playful greeting, substituting “dock” for “doc,” similar to the popular expression “What’s up, doc?”

I’m in ship-shape!

This expression means being in excellent condition, ready and well-prepared for the cruise.

I will never get seasick of these views.

A play on “sick” with “seasick,” expressing an undying appreciation for the oceanic views from the cruise.

Time to get ship-faced

A humorous play on a popular phrase, suggesting a plan to indulge and have a great time onboard the cruise ship.

I’m feeling nauti

A playful wordplay on “naughty,” indicating a mischievous or adventurous mood, especially on a cruise.

I’m having boatloads of fun on this cruise!

This phrase uses “boatloads” to convey the abundance of enjoyment and excitement experienced during the cruise.

Docked and loaded

A play on “locked and loaded,” indicating readiness and excitement upon the ship’s arrival at a destination port.

Knot on my watch

Playing on the word “knot,” a unit of speed for ships, with the popular phrase “not on my watch.”

Related articles:

• Funny Cruise Memes to Brighten up Your Day

Adam Stewart

Adam Stewart is the founder of Cruise Galore. He is a passionate traveler who loves cruising. Adam's goal is to enhance your cruising adventures with practical tips and insightful advice, making each of your journeys unforgettable.

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50 Funny Cruise Jokes And Puns for Buoyant Mood on Board

Created on: November 9, 2023

Jessica Amlee

Cruise ships are like floating cities where the buildings can’t exceed a few decks and the population is temporarily united by a mutual love of buffet lines and questionable karaoke choices. These nautical behemoths whisk away passengers to exotic destinations, offering a smorgasbord of activities that you probably wouldn’t try at home—like salsa dancing with someone who can’t find the beat, or art auctions where you pretend to understand the difference between a Monet and a mojito. It’s a place where you can wake up to the sound of waves, the sight of an endless horizon, and the gentle reminder that yes, you did indeed sing “My Heart Will Go On” last night… and there’s video proof.

Delving into the briny depths of cruise ship jokes, we find a treasure trove of humor as vast as the ocean itself. Here, you might encounter quips about the eternal quest to locate your stateroom in the labyrinthine corridors that all look suspiciously identical—rumor has it that even the captain uses breadcrumbs. Or jests about the poolside loungers, who stake their claim at dawn with towels and a determination that would impress a conquistador. From the perils of a rogue wave splashing your formal wear to the joy of discovering that “all-inclusive” extends to the soft-serve ice cream machine, cruise ship comedy is about navigating the choppy waters of vacation quirks with a lifejacket of laughter snugly fastened.

Best Cruise Jokes

What do you call a cruise full of college graduates? A Scholar-ship.

Yo mama so old, her first cruise was on Noah’s Ark.

Did you hear about the husband and wife who are banned from cruise ships? After that whole poop deck misunderstanding they had.

What does Joseph say to his wife when they go on a cruise? “It’s marytime!”

What vegetable isnt allowed on cruise ships? Leeks.

What do you call a ship full of male cats? Tom Cruise.

What do you call a cruise ship filled with skilled artisans? Great Craftsman Ship.

Where do sick cruise ships go to get healthy? The dock.

Did you hear about the woman who fell off the cruise ship? She has been named Eileen Dover.

Yo mama so old, she once cold called Christopher Columbus and sold him a cruise to America

Mr.Rogers once was on a cruise ship, and fell overboard into the ocean. He was then carried safely to shore by a family of sharks.

What do you call a cruise liner full of psychologists? A Freudian ship.

Did you hear that the flat-earth cruise to Antarctica is canceled? It’s disappointing, but not the end of the world.

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, “I’m on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it’s today…” The bartender says, “Well, since it’s your birthday, I’ll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on me.” As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, “I would like to buy you a drink, too.” The old woman says, “Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.” “Coming up,” says the bartender. As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, “I would like to buy you one, too.” The old woman says, “Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water.” “Coming right up,” the bartender says. As he gives her the drink, he says, “Ma’am, I’m dying of curiosity, why the Scotch with only two drops of water?” The old woman replies, “Sonny, when you’re my age, you’ve learned how to hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue.”

Did you hear about the comedian who performs exclusively on this cruise ship? He specializes in one-liners.

What do you call family reunion on a cruise?? A relation-ship!

The old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said: “Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?” “Yes, I know,” said the lady, “I need both hands to hold onto this hat.” “But, madam, you must know that your privates are exposed!” said the gentleman in earnest. The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, “Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!”

Did you hear about the red cruise ship and blue cruise ship that collided in the Caribbean? The survivors were marooned.

What do you call a cruise ship full of chicken? All Hens on deck!

A cruise ship passes by a remote island, and all the passengers see a bearded man running around and waving his arms wildly. “Captain,” one passenger asks, “who is that man over there?” “I have no idea,” the captain says, “but he goes nuts every year when we pass him.”

What’s it like working on a cruise ship? It has it’s ups and downs.

What do you call a boat of partying zombies? An ooze cruise.

A cruise ship sinks in the middle of the sea. The people on the ship manage to escape on lifeboats. A woman comes to the captain and asks him, “How far is the closest land?”The captain answers, “3 km.” The woman says after, “In which direction?” To which the captain replied, “Down!”

Two old men are sitting on the deck of a cruise ship. The first one asks, “Have you read Marx?” The other one replies, “Yes. I believe that comes from sitting on these wicker chairs.”

What do you call a woman on a cruise ship in Mexico using the diving board at the pool? A broad abroad on a board aboard.

What do you call a cruise director with a broken arm? A shore thing.

A man is walking down the street when he sees a sign in the window of a travel agency that says CRUISES – $100. He goes into the agency and hands the guy $100. The travel agent then whacks him over the head with a baseball bat and throws him into the river. Another man is walking down the street a half hour later, sees the sign, and pays the guy $100. The travel agent then whacks him with the baseball bat and throws him into the river. Sometime later, the two men are floating down the river together and the first man asks, “Do you think they’ll serve any food on this cruise?” The second man says, “I don’t think so. They didn’t do it last year.”

Why don’t secrets ever stay secret on a cruise ship? Because even the waves spill the beans!

What’s a cruise ship’s favorite meal? Ship and dip!

What kind of music do cruise ships like? Anything with a good anchor beat.

Why did the cruise ship start a diet? It had too much cargo on board!

Two Jewish bankers escaped from that sinking Italian cruise ship They were both clinging to a life preserver. One guy, knowing the other can’t swim, says, ” I’m going to try to swim to shore to get some help. Can you float alone?” The second Jewish banker says, “How could you talk business at a time like this?”

Why don’t cruise ships get lonely? Because they’re always full of buoys and gulls!

Why did the cruise ship feel stressed? It was under a lot of pier pressure.

How do you make a cruise ship smile? Give it a little berth.

What’s a pirate’s least favorite thing about a luxury cruise? No plank walking!

A rabbi, a lawyer, and a priest are on a cruise ship when it starts to sink. As chaos ensues and people are running around frantically, the three men huddle together and try to make a grave decision. The rabbi says, “We must save the children!” The lawyer says, “No, screw the children!” Then the priest says, “Do we really have time to screw the children?”

What do you call a cruise ship where the crew won’t stop masturbating in front of passengers? A tugboat.

What do you call a gay cruise? A hardship.

Why was the computer cold on the cruise? It left its Windows open.

An LGBQT cruising ship sinks in the middle of the ocean. Who survives? The flambuoyants.

Recommended : Train Jokes

What does a cannibal say to a waiter on a cruise ship? “Please bring me the passenger list.”

Why was the cruise full of penises and potatoes not popular? It was actually a dick tater ship.

Why don’t black people go on cruise ships? Because they’re not falling for that one again.

Do you have a funny cruise ship joke? Write down your own puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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3 thoughts on “50 Funny Cruise Jokes And Puns for Buoyant Mood on Board”

My wife is nervous about having to talk to strangers on a cruise we are about to take. I said, “Don’t worry. We are all in the same boat.”

I knew everyone on my cruise, guess it was a pretty good relation-ship!

What do you call an AV company specializing in Christian cruises? Cruise-effects.

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10 Funniest Cruise Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

By: Author Carrie Ann Karstunen

Posted on Published: May 19, 2020  - Last updated: July 2, 2022

Do you love going to the comedy shows when you’re on a cruise? I know it’s one of my favorite things to do on a ship. But until cruising starts up again, we’ll have to make do with telling some cruise jokes.

I’ve collected the funniest cruise jokes at sea, so you can crack up your friends and family with some cruise humor. Dad joke alert: some of these are pretty corny! But they’re all clean cruise jokes, and safe for the entire family. Enjoy!

Bankers aweigh

Two bankers were the only survivors when their cruise ship sank. They were both clinging to a single life preserver. One banker, knowing that his colleague couldn’t swim, says, “I think I can make it to shore to get help. Can you float alone?”

The other banker replies, “How can you talk business at a time like this?”

The booze cruise

A cruise ship is headed back from the Caribbean on its last night at sea. Just before dinner time, the captain gets on the loudspeaker.

“This is your captain speaking. I regret to inform you that there was an error with our provisioning. While there are 2000 passengers on board, we only have enough food for 1000 dinners. However, we do have plenty of alcohol, so anyone who is willing to give up their meal will receive free drinks for the rest of the night.”

A few hours later, the captain gets on the loudspeaker again.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I apologize but it appears we’ve run out of booze. On the upside, we still have a thousand delicious meals for you to enjoy!”

A cruise ship passenger is standing on the deck, looking out at the ocean. As the ship passes a small island, he spots a figure on the beach. He can see it’s a very thin man with wild hair, dressed in rags. He watches him wave his arms, jump up and down, and run back and forth along the beach.

The passenger turns to the Captain, who is standing nearby:

“Captain, what’s up with that guy?”

The Captain just shrugs.

“No clue. He’s always this happy when we sail by.”

The sunbathers

Two elderly gentlemen are relaxing in the sun on a cruise ship. One turns to the other and asks, “Have you read Marx?”

“Oh, yes.” the other replies, “I believe it’s from sitting on these deck chairs”.

A magician worked on a cruise ship. There was a new set of passengers each week, so the magician performed the same tricks over and over again. The captain’s pet parrot came to all the magic shows and began to understand how each of the magic tricks worked.

Once the parrot understood, he began to shout during the show, “Look, he’s hiding the rabbit under the table!” or “Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?”

Every week, the parrot ruined the show. The magician was exasperated but couldn’t do anything. After all, it was the captain’s parrot.

One night, the ship hit an iceberg and sank. The magician found himself stranded on the iceberg…along with the parrot. They stared at each other with hatred, but neither uttered a word. This went on for days. Finally on the fourth day, the parrot couldn’t hold back any longer. “OK, I give up.” he said, “What did you do with the ship?”

The party pooper

Why couldn’t the cruisers play cards?

Because the Captain was standing on the deck.

Rolex below deck s

A rich guy took a cruise to a tropical island, and decided to sunbathe on the beach. Wanting an even tan, he took off his luxury watch and slipped it in his pocket.

Back on board at the end of the day, he realized that his watch was gone—it must have fallen out of his pocket. Too embarrassed to admit he’d lost such an expensive item, he decided not to tell anyone.

A moment later, the Captain’s voice came on the loudspeaker. “Ladies and gentlemen, this is an announcement to the passenger who lost the Rolex Pearlmaster on the beach……The time is now 6:54 PM.”

Spring Break

A bunch of fraternity brothers go on a cruise for Spring Break. Halfway through their vacation the ship wrecks, and the young men escape on a lifeboat. They floated on the ocean for a couple of days, but no one came to rescue them. On the third day, one of the men noticed a bottle floating near the lifeboat.

“Whoa, what if there’s a genie in that bottle?” he asked. He reached into the water, picked up the bottle, and rubbed it.

With a loud whoosh, a huge genie appeared. “I am a powerful genie, but I can only grant one wish,” the genie shouted.

“That’s a no-brainer!” the frat boy said, “I wish the entire ocean was made of beer!”

The genie granted the wish, and promptly vanished.

“Dude!” groaned one of the other brothers. “Now we have to pee in the boat!”

Rethinking sinking

A very nervous first-time cruiser approached the Captain. “Do ships like this sink very often?” he asked.

Replied the captain, “No, not too often. Usually, it’s only once.”

Shipped out

A married man walks into his local pub, where all of his bachelor friends are gathered at the bar. “Hey, Dave!” shouts one of his buddies. “How’d you talk your wife into letting you come out with us?”

“Oh, I’m on my own for the week. She took the kids on a Caribbean cruise.”

“No, she wanted to.”

Which of these cruise jokes is your favorite? Let me know in the comments below!

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Tagged: funny cruise memes

Cruise Humor / Cruising / General

May 20, 2020

 by Prof. Cruise · Published May 20, 2020 · Last modified June 6, 2021

The 30 BEST Cruise Memes

I’m not sure the highlighted portion of the above title would pass a lie detector test: “BEST cruise memes? That’s a lie!” But creating dozens of cruise memes has served as a poor – but better than growing my own sourdough starter or busting a hip trying to out-dance my...

About Prof. Cruise

Given name Sarah, but also answers to Prof. Cruise. Retired after 10 years as a college professor to focus full-time on her primary research interest: travel. With a concentration in cruising.  Home port: Seattle.  Mom of a shaggy-haired dog and a shaggy-haired human.  Lover of books and dessert.  Fancies herself a bit of a comedian – you’ve been warned.

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How Kamala Harris’s awkward moments became internet gold

Progressive social media users are making clips of Harris go viral, potentially boosting her profile with younger voters.

Kamala Harris has emerged as the top backup candidate should President Biden end his reelection campaign. She has also been embraced by another influential constituency: hyper-online progressive content creators.

In the past week, Harris has won a surge of attention online from people recasting odd or awkward public moments into memes or viral video clips that often burnish her as relatable and down to earth. The phenomenon embraced by X personalities, TikTokers and Instagram meme accounts has been compared to the rise of a meme stock: absurd, somewhat ironic, but with momentum that could have lasting results, boosting her standing among Democratic voters.

Many of the awkward moments being embraced on social media have previously been criticized by others as evidence that Harris is unserious and out of touch. In December, the Republican National Committee shared a four-minute montage titled “Kamala Harris Is ‘Unburdened’ By Competency” that compiled multiple examples of her encouraging an audience to consider “what can be, unburdened by what has been.” Last week, the same profound line was among the moments embraced by social posts that positioned Harris as a likable oddball.

“Everyone who doesn’t want Trump in office was like, okay who do we turn to? And she just has these funny relatable moments online,” said Bailey Stoltzfus, a law student in Arizona who has posted about Harris on X. “She’s goofy, people characterize her as a wine aunt.” A spokesperson for Harris declined to comment on the memes.

Posts featuring generally favorable video edits of Harris’s awkward or funny public moments have amassed hundreds of thousands of views on TikTok and Instagram. A thread on X compiling such clips, like when she gleefully declared “I love Venn diagrams” during a 2022 event on defending reproductive rights, garnered nearly 14 million views.

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Last week, searches for “Kamala” and “coconut tree” spiked to their highest levels all year, Google data shows, as the pressure on Biden to step aside increased and the internet rejoiced in a 2023 speech . At a White House ceremony for an initiative to boost opportunity for Hispanics, Harris broke into a hearty laugh as she related that her mother would say “I don’t know what’s wrong with you young people. You think you just fell out of a coconut tree?” to remind her children to be aware of the context they were born into.

https://t.co/QpJF51bQYU pic.twitter.com/Ai1SmM90ON — Kristi Yamaguccimane (@TheWapplehouse) July 3, 2024

Harris’s new online prominence could help give the Democratic Party new prominence with young people — including major content creators — who are hesitant to vote for Biden again due to his climate policies, support of Israel’s war in Gaza , mishandling of the ongoing pandemic, and signing a bill that could ban TikTok.

Ryan Long, a 22-year-old college student, recently spent three hours making a remix of viral clips of Harris set to a Charli XCX song that has been viewed more than 2 million times.

“In the current society, you feel really helpless,” he said. “What can we really do? It’s hard to get politically engaged. All you can do is you can make edits, you can make tweets. It’s a way people can do their best to not support Trump with the resources we have.”

why did I stay up till 3am making a von dutch brat coconut tree edit featuring kamala harris and why can’t I stop watching it on repeat pic.twitter.com/hqcmerD1Pb — ryan (@ryanlong03) July 3, 2024

Though a dedicated online fan base known as the #KHive boosted Harris’s doomed presidential run back in 2020, her online resurgence is being led by progressive leftists on X and Instagram who supported Bernie Sanders’s 2020 run.

“Me, shedding my toxic Bernie Bro baggage and embracing the warmth of Momala’s embrace beneath the coconut tree,” Emma Vigeland, co-host of the leftist talk show, the Majority Report, posted alongside images of Nicole Kidman celebrating after her divorce from Tom Cruise.

“There’s a bit of being irony-pilled behind it,” said Will Poole, who supported Sanders in 2020 and runs an account on X with more than 137,000 followers that consists mostly of jokes and memes. “It’s like, s--- seems dire right now, but if you give me the drugs that she’s getting then hell yeah, I’m going to roll with her.”

Diana Claire, a TikTok content creator and Instagram meme account administrator, who is based in Oakland, Calif., said that many people like Harris because she seems different from the typical D.C. politician. “For so long it was the good old boys, Biden and Trump talking about golf,” Claire said. “Kamala is a West Coast fun mom. She looks like a bureaucrat that would still have fun after work and go to karaoke.”

I’m all in on President Kamala. We need a Gemini Rising woman President from California who is on pills+wine, is campy, and didn’t get married until she was middle aged because she was too busy being a 365 party girlboss. Who cares if she’s weird? At least she’s not a felon or 80 — superfun site (@chickenstrip007) July 2, 2024

However, progressives boosting Harris content online say their politics remain distinctly to the left of hers and they are critical of her history as a prosecutor.

June Sternbach, a content creator and co-host of the “Western Kabuki” internet culture podcast, has posted Harris content to her more than 140,000 followers on X. “I still think she’s representative of everything that’s wrong with the Democratic Party — but she’s funny. It’s about the vibe,” she said. “I think it genuinely started from a palace of irony, but there’s a level where it’s not irony too. No one likes Biden, everyone feels so stuck, everyone feels so down and out. Part of the Kamala thing is the potential that things might just be slightly better.”

Compared to Biden, Harris has an uncanny ability to generate viral moments. After Biden was elected, a clip of her in sunglasses and workout gear proudly proclaiming “ We did it, Joe ” went viral and became a meme. Former Harris staffers said that they weren’t surprised to see her recent breakout success online.

“Even though she’s been in office for the last few years, I don’t think people were looking at her quite as closely or seriously as they are now with the realities of our ticket,” said Deja Foxx, Harris’s digital influencer strategist during her primary run in 2020. “I kind of always saw the potential for this and I’m excited to see it taking off now.”

Foxx and other staffers on Harris’s presidential run attempted to seed her audio clips on TikTok in 2019 and 2020, when the platform was relatively nascent, without much success. Now, some of those early sound bites and video clips, such as Harris dancing down a hallway alongside a line of children , are being resurfaced and getting more traction. “I always thought she had these really great, memeable trending sounds,” said Foxx.

Jules Terpak, a digital strategist and content creator, said the clip and other video edits function like “modern political ads,” and appeared to be swaying sentiment surrounding her candidacy. “[They] are curated by voters and have an artistic touch that doesn’t go through a chain of command before being sent out to potentially thousands, if not millions of voters,” she said.

Claire, the Instagram meme account administrator, says the possibility Harris could benefit from viral content that makes the vice president more relatable causes her to be careful not to boost such content too much. “She’s clearly trying to put on a facade that she’s a good guy,” said Claire, “but we all know what she’s like, we know who she’s arrested, we know the things that she’s done and she’s had a mixed record. She’s no better than any other politician.”

View this post on Instagram A post shared by 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐬 𝐛𝐲 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 (@read_receipts)