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Jamie's journey: Vallas family supports transgender daughter

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Jamie Vallas is nearly 21 and finally feels as if she’s who she was supposed to be all along. She was a kid who wore her sister’s old ballet clothes, who would find wigs and put bath towels over her short hair, who never wanted Halloween to end. She remembers being 14, presenting then as a boy, and taking a selfie in her sister’s bedroom.

“I have a big smile on my face as I’m holding up an iPad and I’m wearing my sister’s bridal prom dress. And I just see how happy I look and it felt right,” she said.

Although she’d had her name picked out since seventh grade, Jamie began to transition in high school. She remembered not being very patient at first with people who wouldn’t accept her newfound identity.

“Ever since I transitioned I was very like, ‘this is who I am, accept me or you are not in my life.’ I was very forceful,” she said. “My parents taught me about more patience.”

And the Vallas’ story is notable for the sheer amount of family support Jamie has received. “I was born into a very family-oriented environment, and family’s there for each other,” Jamie explained.

At first, like many parents, the Vallases weren’t sure if this was what Jamie truly wanted. “We all thought it was more of a phase, because I tend to go through a lot of phases in my life,” Jamie recalled. “And we weren’t sure if this was the true decision I wanted to make, because it’s life-changing, going through surgery.”

“We didn’t know where it was going. Then when Jamie decided, this is where the research had to come in,” Renee Vallas, Jamie’s mom, remembered.

It was easier for both parents to accept Jamie once they realized her identity had a biological basis, though Renee remembers how gradually her feelings evolved.

“It was very difficult on us as parents because I had to mourn Luke in order to accept Jamie,” she said. “It’s not easy. It takes time and then finally something hit me, and then I realized, this isn’t my life. This is her life.”

Dean Vallas, Jamie’s father, had always felt protective of his child. Even now, he says, “my job with Jamie is to keep her safe.” Seeing Jamie’s feminine tendencies, his impulse was to put her in a smaller school to protect her from bullying. Years later, this presented a new challenge: she was the first trans student in her school’s history. Both Jamie and her father recall her younger brother, Evan, getting in trouble for talking back to a homophobic teacher.

“He was getting made fun of on the side, I could tell,” Jamie said about Evan. “I now see it. I didn’t at the time, I was like, ‘well, you should love me no matter what.’ We were very standoffish with each other, we didn’t say anything to each other for a long period of time.”

But the siblings are close once again, and the rest of the family echoes Evan’s support: Jamie’s 90-year-old grandfather sometimes can’t remember his son’s name, but he always uses the right pronouns. Another interesting family connection is that Jamie is the niece of Paul Vallas, former CEO of Chicago Public Schools, former candidate for lieutenant governor of Illinois, and Dean’s brother. Dean managed Paul’s 2002 campaign for governor: Paul lost to Rod Blagojevich in the primary.

“I’m going to be like that offensive lineman, to make holes for the family,” Dean said. “It’s really difficult for someone to push back against me. So my family was quick to embrace because of that, because I manage things in the family.”

An unlikely but incredibly important source of support was the Greek Orthodox church. When Dean called his local priest to ask for advice about his transitioning child, the priest asked, “Oh, you mean Jamie?” He had already seen the new name on Facebook. He then found a Greek Orthodox prayer written for “Modification of Gender” and sent it to the family. It draws parallels between Biblical figures who have changed their names and someone assuming a new identity. Dean credited this acceptance to his church’s lack of papal control, letting individual priests and parishioners be more liberal and experimental.

Renee found Jamie a LGBTQ youth group in Naperville. “They were so warm and embracing, she couldn’t wait to go every Tuesday,” she said. “And they educated you.”

“You saw what other people were going through,” Jamie recalled. “You could relate to them. You could have conversations with them and they wouldn’t look at you as like an oddity to the world.”

Jamie’s role models are trans model Carmen Carrera and her own sister, whose style, feminist values and work ethic impressed her.

“Carmen Carrera [is] this beautiful Colombian transgender model,” Jamie explained. “She inspired me to want to work on my beauty, work on my appearance as a lady. That was my fantasy of a woman—a drop-dead beautiful woman. Nice figure, melodious voice. She blew me away. But my sister internally had that fire, like, I want to be known as a woman, I’m strong, I want to be taken seriously in this room and I want to be successful and do my own thing, and work hard.”

Jamie, too, aspires to be a role model for others, and already has been among her parents’ friends. “When my ultra-conservative, Fox teleprompter-reading neighbor is all in with Jamie, we celebrate it and why, because they get to know her. That’s the key,” Dean said.

“The ones that don’t [embrace her], it’s not part of our life,” Renee added.

“I want to present myself as a loving role model,” Jamie said. “When people see the word transgender, I don’t want them to think about it’s all about being a girl and her looks. I want it to be that when people look at transgender, they see how I am. I’m nice, I’m outgoing, I’m positive, I’m fun, I’m optimistic, I’m bright, I’m generous, kind, caring, loving and I treat other people the way they want to be treated. So you see that I’m just this person. … I’m just like everybody else. It’s not all about the looks and the body, it’s what lies inside, too.”

Whether it’s the sheer amount of documents they needed to alter or preparation for her recently completed medical transition, her parents have understood that there’s been more obstacles in Jamie’s way than there might be for a cis girl her age.

“When your focus has been since you’re self-aware is on trying to be a woman, how do you focus on the rest of your life?” Dean explained.

“I can see her growing into herself,” Renee said. “It is a long process, it is a big step. It changes your life, and it changes your family’s life. But for the better.”

“It was very time-consuming. My entire life’s focus was wanting the body that I’ve always wanted,” Jamie explained. But she has some ideas about what her future might look like, “I like to connect with other people. It’s a skill of mine. I like to communicate. I want to get out of the suburbs. I want to meet people older than me who have their life figured out, I want positive role models.”

She still feels she will always be connected to her past. “I’ve always been this person, I’ve never really changed,” she said. “I grow, I mature. My physique and looks changed, and yes, I changed my body that I came in, but my heart and my personality and who I was was always still there. I’m that boy who lived next door who came and swam in your swimming pool when I was younger. It’s still me. I’m proud to own that I used to be Luke, and I still am Luke deep inside. And I’m happy.”

Yet embracing her identity may be the key to her future success. “I was hesitant to go on this interview because I’ve always wanted to be a woman, and I’ve always wanted to live my life as a normal woman, and not just a public figure as the trans person,” Jamie said. “But I’ve also wanted to help, and put myself out there and tell my story. I feel really blessed to be given this life. Yes, I’m transgender, but also the support I have is incredible. I’ve had everything I’ve wanted with myself and life. I’ve always had my family. I’m finally able to shine and be who I want to be.”

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June 28, 2024

From Shame To Self-Acceptance: Oprah Winfrey Dives Deeper Into Her Weight Journey

Oprah reads the full letter she wrote to her younger self, acknowledging past struggles in her journey with self-esteem and people-pleasing.

Oprah Winfrey, a media mogul who has long been in the public eye, recently opened up about her weight journey on “The Jamie Kern Lima” podcast.

Despite hosting numerous shows on weight loss, Winfrey admitted, “I can’t even tell you how many conversations about it, but still carry my own shame.”

The conversation touched on pivotal moments in the billionaire’s life, including the famous 1988 episode of her show where she dramatically illustrated her weight loss with a wagon full of fat. However, it was in 2023 that Oprah had her “big Revelation” about weight management.

“There’s something in the brain that allows people like myself to metabolize fat differently than other people,” the OWN founder explained, shedding light on the biological aspects of weight control that had eluded her for decades.

She candidly discussed the public scrutiny she faced, saying, “For five years, every single week…there was a tabloid story or some exploitation of my weight.” She recalled hurtful experiences, including a skit on “In Living Color” that mocked her size.

“One of the most hurtful things was [when] ‘In Living Color’ had done a skit where the woman…just kept eating and getting fatter and fatter and fatter,” the television host shared. “The comedy bit was that eventually she just exploded, and you know the whole audience fell out, and the woman…was one of the sisters portraying me, but that was just accepted.”

Despite the challenges, Winfrey has reached a turning point . “I’m not carrying it into the next decade. I’m done with it,” she declared, emphasizing her decision to shed the emotional burden of weight shame, expressing concern about how weight issues impact women’s lives, stating, “We believe the lie that our weight is our worth.” She advocated for faster dissemination of information to help people heal and stop tying their self-worth to their weight.

In her journey toward self-acceptance, the television producer has set new goals for herself, focusing on overall health rather than just numbers on a scale. She shared her experience of gradually building her physical endurance, starting with walking a mile. “It took me like an hour and a half to do it,” she recalled, but she persevered and improved steadily.

While Winfrey confirmed using medication as a maintenance tool for weight management, she emphasized the importance of making informed decisions about one’s health.

As Winfrey has already reached her 70th birthday, she reflected on her journey with a letter to her 20-year-old self, who she calls a “beautiful brown skin girl.” In the letter, she acknowledges past struggles with self-esteem and pleasing others. Despite the trauma, her faith in God remained her greatest strength. Inspired by Philippians 3:14, a pivotal moment came when she answered Chris Clark’s call.

Winfrey emphasizes the importance of self-love, seeing oneself through one’s eyes, and understanding that success is a process. She concludes by affirming her journey with few regrets.

RELATED CONTENT : Oprah Winfrey Down Bad Due To ‘Serious’ Stomach Flu, Gayle King Reveals

• Jamie Kern Lima
• Oprah Winfrey
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Jamie Kenna gives away some of Alfred Broome's intriguing journey on House of the Dragon season 2

I t takes a village to make a show as complicated as House of the Dragon . You've got lead characters like Rhaenyra, Daemon and Aegon Targaryen, as well as secondary players like Larys Strong and Jacaerys Velaryon. But what about the walk-on guys who only say a few lines in the background...until they become hugely important?

Ser Alfred Broome (Jamie Kenna) may be one of those characters. One of Queen Rhaenyra's counselors, he was introduced in the second episode of season 2 , gently suggesting that maybe Rhaenyra did order the hit on the young Prince Jaehaerys Targaryen, despite her protests to the contrary. Rhaenyra's cousin Rhaenys (Eve Best) shut that suggestion down.

“[Episode two] was a really nice introduction to his manner, to how he feels,” Kenna told The Hollywood Reporter . “Because I think even in that tiny little bit, they did a very nice moment where they focused on the guards staring at me and Rhaenys gets me in line. If you watch it again, it sets it up to show that this guy’s not afraid to say something. And that’s very much where the journey goes, with the climax of that in the last episode. No spoilers, but he tries to take things into his own hands a little bit.”

If you're read George R.R. Martin's book Fire & Blood , you know that Alfred Broome does indeed go on a bit of a journey. (Beware SPOILERS ahead!) Basically, on account of no one liking him very much, Rhaenyra passes him over for a promotion. What he does next I'll leave to the show to lay out, but it lines up with Kenna saying that Broome "tries to take things into his own hands."

Going into further spoilers, Kenna said that he's been on the set of Harrenhal , the crumbling castle where Daemon Targaryen is heading. “My first day, I walked on set, and I’m with Matt Smith on the set of Harrenhal – which is mind-boggling, how they build those sets out of wood – and he couldn’t have been friendlier," he said. "He couldn’t have been more welcoming. Matt Smith is a very, very generous actor. So the whole experience exceeded expectations… The atmosphere is so friendly. Everyone’s just so happy to be there. It feels like a small job, which is lovely.”

Compliments about Matt Smith aside, it's interesting to hear that Ser Alfred will eventually make his way to Harrenhal, where Daemon is establishing a military toehold in the Riverlands on behalf of his wife, Queen Rhaenyra. And if you want a more general tease, Kenna is promising “excitement, controversy, war and naughtiness" ahead in season 2. “It’s all a mess,” the actor says of the looming civil war. “People are trying to grasp control. So [Ser Alfred] very much wants to go in and stamp. He thinks we should be going all guns blazing, sending out messages. He’s a general, so he’s not rash. He wants to build an army, and he wants to do things the right way, in a functional way.”

A veteran of British soaps like Coronation Street as well as series like The Crown , Jamie Kenna describes House of the Dragon as his dream job. “I knew it was the biggest, it was the next level that I’d always wanted,” he said. “This is the job I’d been waiting for. While I was so elated when I did get it, I didn’t realize, even then, the scale of [ House of the Dragon ]. There’s house banners on some of the world’s most iconic buildings, dragons on the Empire State Building. They didn’t do that for Coronation Street .”

He's enjoyed the experience so much that he even got the House Broome crest tattooed on his leg. “It’s the best job I’ve ever had.” See him in action when House of the Dragon returns this Sunday night on HBO and Max.

To stay up to date on everything fantasy, science fiction, and WiC, follow our all-encompassing Facebook page and Twitter account , sign up for our exclusive newsletter and check out our YouTube channel .

This article was originally published on winteriscoming.com as Jamie Kenna gives away some of Alfred Broome's intriguing journey on House of the Dragon season 2 .

Rep. Jamie Raskin says 'honest and serious conversations are taking place' about Biden's political future after debate

Rep. Jamie Raskin, D-Md., on Sunday acknowledged that there are “very honest, and serious and rigorous conversations taking place” in the Democratic Party following President Joe Biden’s dismal performance at the presidential debate on Thursday.

Raskin’s remarks are a break from what most top Democrats have said publicly in their defense of the president as they acknowledge Biden had a “bad” debate but argue it doesn’t disqualify him from running for president.

“I’ve been very clear that it was an underwhelming performance on Thursday, during the debate, as President Biden and his campaign have acknowledged. It certainly was a setback. But of course, I believe a setback is nothing more than a setup for a comeback,” House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries told MSNBC’s “The Weekend” on Sunday.

But privately, NBC News reported Saturday , top Democrats are concerned about Biden’s campaign.

“We’re having a serious conversation about what to do,” Raskin said in an interview with MSNBC’s Ali Velshi on Sunday morning, adding: “One thing I can tell you is that regardless of what President Biden decides, our party is going to be unified, and our party also needs him at the very center of our deliberations in our campaign, and so whether he’s the candidate or someone else is the candidate.”

Several lawmakers told NBC News on Friday that it was time to replace Biden as the nominee, including one who said it’s “time to talk about an open convention and a new Democratic nominee,” but none have attached their names to their remarks.

During an interview with MSNBC’s “The Weekend” on Saturday, Biden’s senior adviser Anita Dunn said Biden has not discussed dropping out of the race with aides.

“The president’s going to continue to be out there. And he’s going to make his case for why Donald Trump is a threat to this country, and why there is a better path ahead for Americans,” Dunn said.

Biden is in Camp David this weekend with his family, huddling with loved ones following a tumultuous week and a dismal debate performance.

While the trip was planned ahead of the debate, Biden was expected to discuss the future of his campaign with his family.

Alexandra Marquez is a politics reporter for NBC News.

Jamie Oliver's wife Jools teases bold transformation for son River, 7

The naked chef star and model share five children.

Jools Oliver has recently been in the United States and alongside several snaps of her stateside adventure, she  also shared a stunning gift for her young  son, River, seven .

Taking to her Instagram Stories, Jools shared a snap of a pair of cowboy boots were destined to go to her youngest . The item would certainly be a bold part of the youngster's wardrobe, but we're certain that the seven-year-old would be able to pull off the zany style with ease.

In her caption, Jools also revealed a sweet nickname for her son, saying: " Baby cowboy boots, Riv these are coming home to you ." The mum-of-five finished off her post with a heart emoji.

Jools has a sweet bond with her children and last month the star sweetly shared the cutest image of her son Buddy, 13 , back when he was a baby. In the photo, the tot was being cradled by one of the model's close friends.

At just 13, Buddy has already been a busy boy; the teen is following in his famous father's footsteps, working on a cookbook, named  Let's Cook and hosting a cooking YouTube show, Cooking Buddies , with a show of the same name set to air on CBBC in the summer.

Just like his dad, Buddy wants cooking delicious food to be easy and accessible for all, saying of his book: "None of [the recipes] are fancy or hard to do – you'll find things like easy breakfasts, meatballs, pizza and some sweet treats – I just hope people enjoy giving them a go."

Jamie and Jools recently had a reason to celebrate as the happy couple marked their 24th wedding anniversary , and then went all out for the occasion, marking it in Las Vegas, complete with an Elvis impersonator.

Jools, 49, looked as gorgeous as ever, with sun-kissed skin and blush pink lips, but she also ditched the typical bridal attire and donned a pair of slim-fit, skinny blue jeans, a white lace top and a pair of terracotta boots.

In a caption, Jamie enthused: "Happy 24th wedding anniversary @joolsoliver 24 years!!! Love you - Las Vegas baby!! @gracelandweddingchapellv big love really good fun Jamie xxx."

Jamie and Jools originally tied the knot in June 2000 at All Saints Church in Rickling, Essex, after dating for just over eight years . Photos of the pair at the traditional church after their ceremony showed them walking beneath a beautiful arch made from blue, purple and ivory flowers adorning the entrance.

Jamie previously reflected on how special the day was for the couple. "My wedding day was one of the best days of my life, we kept it private and surrounded ourselves by loving friends and family and what a joy it was… Jools thanks for being the best friend a wonderful wife and truly amazing mother to our Oliver clan," he wrote on Instagram.

SEE:  Jamie Oliver's son Buddy towers over mum Jools in heartwarming photo

LOOK:  Jamie Oliver offers unseen peek at courtyard at sprawling £6m family home

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He died in Hamilton's jail within 24 hours of going in. His family won't give up until they get answers

Jamie dooley, 41, died in the hamilton-wentworth detention centre on may 28.

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Warning: This story contains references to suicide.

Standing on a grassy patch and baking under the summer sun, Tangie Gagnon stood next to her daughter, Melissa Dooley, and wiped away tears as she stared at the Hamilton-Wentworth Detention Centre.

Gagnon's eldest child, 41-year-old Jamie Dooley, spent his final moments in jail before dying on May 28.

"It takes less than one night to die here, but [Jamie] managed to live on the street for three years without an overdose or even one close call," Melissa told CBC Hamilton, saying his death has been "catastrophic" for her family.

It's been almost a month since Dooley died and questions are swirling about how it happened.

Andrew Morrison, a spokesperson for Ontario's Ministry of the Solicitor General, confirmed a prisoner died on May 28.

He said an investigation is underway, but couldn't share any other details.

Pandemic took toll on Dooley, family says

Dooley is remembered for his generosity, his love for family, and his athleticism and work as a sous chef, among other things.

"We're a very close family," Gagnon said.

He grew up in Hamilton, where he was bullied in school and was assaulted in adulthood because he was a trans man, his family said.

Before the COVID-19 pandemic, Dooley moved to St. John's in hopes of having a fresh start.

His family said he would buy bikes, paint them and give them away for free.

During the pandemic, Dooley's family said, he developed paranoia and other mental health issues. His family suspects the isolation may have been hard on Dooley, who always loved having company.

When Dooley returned to Hamilton a year later, his mental health had deteriorated.

He ended up unhoused and sleeping in tents.

His family said they tried getting Dooley help for his mental health and he had attempted suicide multiple times, but he was never officially diagnosed and was quickly released from hospitals.

Dooley also stayed at Willow's Place, a shelter for women, transgender and non-binary people.

Dooley died in segregation, family says

On May 26, Dooley's family said, police arrested him while he was outside for missing a court date a month earlier.

They said he spent a night in a holding cell before being remanded to the jail and entering segregation.

"We thought Jamie would be safe. Clearly we were wrong," Melissa said.

Segregation, also known as solitary confinement, is when prisoners are physically and socially isolated in a cell for 22 hours or more.

A recent CBC investigation revealed segregation in Ontario jails has been ramping up since 2019, despite the Ontario Human Rights Commission urging the province to phase out segregation in its jails since 2016.

In Hamilton, it has been happening at a far greater rate than the rest of Ontario and has met the United Nations' threshold for torture, with some segregation periods lasting as long as 21 days. Under its Mandela Rules, the UN considers segregation of over 15 consecutive days a form of torture, calling it "cruel" and "inhuman."

• CBC Investigates Ontario ombudsman to 'raise questions' with province about segregation in jails
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• CBC Investigates Former Ontario inmates say complaints system is broken after docs reveal medical concerns, abuse allegations

A third of the Hamilton inmates who were segregated had a mental health alert on their file, meaning they disclosed a mental illness, demonstrated behaviour that suggested mental illness or had shown signs of or had said they were thinking about suicide.

There were also 112 people in segregation who had "severe mental illness" and 223 people on suicide watch, which is when the imprisoned person needs "increased supervision" due to a "high risk of suicide or self-harm."

It's unclear if Dooley had a mental health alert on file or why he was put in segregation.

The province lists six reasons for putting people in segregation:

• They pose security risks.
• They pose security risks for medical concerns.
• They need protection.
• They need protection for medical concerns.
• For misconduct.
• For refusing to be searched.

The province previously told CBC Hamilton some people also request to enter segregation conditions.

Dooley's family suggested he may have been put in segregation because he was trans. The province didn't answer questions about if Dooley was in segregation and if so, why.

Dooley's family said he refused breakfast at 7 a.m. on May 28 and was found unresponsive at 11 a.m.

• Prisoners in Hamilton put in segregation at far greater rate than any other Ontario jail, data shows

Dave Thompson, a superintendent with Hamilton Paramedic Services, told CBC Hamilton that paramedics were called shortly after 11 a.m. for a medical emergency.

Paramedics pronounced Dooley dead at the scene.

Dooley's family wonders if someone would have spotted Dooley unresponsive sooner if he wasn't in segregation.

His family said an autopsy was done and found Dooley's cause of death was "unnatural," and they're waiting for the toxicology report. Sudden deaths from unnatural causes in jails automatically trigger provincial inquests.

Family members suspect it was an overdose because they say a small bag with crystals was found near Dooley's body in the jail. Where the bag came from is unclear.

Dooley's family said he self-medicated with crystal meth and fought drug addiction that got worse during the pandemic.

'Jamie was loved and we're not going to give up'

The province did not say how many prisoners have died at the jail in recent years, but at least 15 have died there since 2012.

The jail was previously the focus of a massive inquest into the overdose deaths of eight men in the facility and led to a jury making 62 recommendations to prevent future deaths.

About 50 people — including prison rights advocates and families of others who have died in the jail — gathered with Dooley's family on Tuesday evening outside the jail, trying to raise awareness about deaths in custody.

Those at the rally spoke to each other, waving signs and walking around the jail, for about two hours.

At one point, they also all let out a collective scream.

"Years have passed, countless recommendations have been made, yet we still console new family members and fight for change in a system that is broken," said Amy McKechnie, whose brother Ryan died at the jail in 2017 . An inquest hasn't yet been conducted.

"To those who may have negative or disrespectful comments, who say, 'Don't do the crime if you can't do the time,' ... our loved ones were human beings who deserved basic humanity and human rights."

While they couldn't be seen from the outside, prisoners inside the detention centre could be heard banging on the windows.

Dooley's family said they won't stop their search for answers.

"Jamie was loved and we're not going to give up," Melissa said.

"We're going to make sure accountability happens. If it has to take a decade, we'll still be standing here."

If you're experiencing suicidal thoughts or having a mental health crisis, there is help out there:

• Trans Lifeline – 1-877-330-6366. It offers full anonymity and confidentiality.
• The Canada Suicide Prevention Service: 1-833-456-4566 (phone) | 45645 (Text, 4 p.m. to midnight ET only) |  crisisservicescanada.ca .
• Kids Help Phone: 1-800-668-6868. You can also text CONNECT to 686868 and get immediate support from a crisis responder through the Crisis Text Line, powered by Kids Help Phone. Live Chat counselling at  www.kidshelpphone.ca .
• In Quebec (French): Association Québécoise de prévention du suicide: 1-866-APPELLE (1-866-277-3553)
• Canadian Association for Suicide Prevention:  Find a 24-hour crisis centre .
• COAST — 905-972-8338 or Toll Free: 1-844-972-8338.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Bobby Hristova is a journalist with CBC Hamilton. He reports on all issues, but has a knack for stories that hold people accountable, stories that focus on social issues and investigative journalism. He previously worked for the National Post and CityNews in Toronto. You can contact him at [email protected].

• Send a pitch directly to Bobby
• Follow @bobbyhristova on Twitter

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